Well, I don't care if it rains or freezes,
long as I got my plastic Jesus,
sittin' on the dashboard of my car.

Comes in colors, pink and pleasant,
glows in the dark 'cause it's iridescent,
take it with you when you travel far.

Get yourself a sweet Madonna,
dressed in rhinestones sittin' on a
pedestal of abalone shell.

Goin' ninety, I ain't scary,
'cause I've got the Virgin Mary,
assurin' me that I won't go to Hell.